It all began one day with one phone call... "there is a trip to tuscany do you want to go?" ... that morning i was at my worst low depressive mood.. in a flash i said 'yes maybe', and then in a span of few seconds said 'oh yes why not?'. That also inspired my friend who said come what may i will come with you, irrespective of whoever else joins in or not.
Ofcourse before this one should know that i had never been on a planned holiday.. mostly if did plan it never materialized. Nor had i taken annual leave ever to go beyond Bangalore my home town, cant equate that to a holiday destination.
Mind you all this i was doing to find inner peace, and some sorta light at the end of the tunnel, a blinding flash of everything going right and showing me the way.
So there i was in the middle of my holiday sitting one day with a glass of bubbly and looking pensive and watching the sunset and listening to some age ol music in a villa in Lucca... and wondering when all of this would happen. In the midst of a teary discussion i mentioned this to my dear friend, who very sweetly questioned me on how i am sure its to happen now "hmm so its timed for your holiday is it?".
Thats when it hit me, what the hell am i doing? why cant i just enjoy the time and space i have got after ages instead of sitting and analysing or waiting for something to happen. (not that i gave up on that instantly)
Being in Italy we would visit loads of chruches, being a catholic this is a big thing. So there i was a sinner cause Sundays is a must visit church day, and i havent been near a church for a long long time.
I knew that God would say what made you wander here today! But hell i think i made up..(not really). Though i went to the Vatican - Basillica - Mecca for Catholics !
So i had this one on one with God, and told him that i am tired of all this waiting for the right path, all i ask of you is to give me the strength to face whatever comes my way. and i would like it if you show me the way :)
I know he has been kind to me all these years and will be kind to me. He will teach me the lessons i need to learn and also show me not to hurt anyone as i know it will come back to me ten folds. Lesson i have learnt it to just try my level best to ensure i do as much good as i can, and lie as less as i can....
the search for inner peace never ends, cause it all depends on you alone.
So there by ends myItalian Holiday ... need a another holiday for inner peace ;)
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
